When I first started school and mind you this is pre-k, I was already one very confident person but that was all personality and character NOT regarding or understanding that being confident about your body was another level and another layer of confidence. So, my Catholic private school had school uniforms and grade pre-k thru 1st grade you had to wear this jumper skirt that was over a white specific style shirt and then white socks and a specific brand of shoes (that all boys and girls would have to wear). At that age group it was white Keds tennis shoes.
You might be wondering what that has to do with this post? Well, I never paid attention to my physical attributes until much later in life and it was only because of others pointing it out. So, one thing began to become obvious to me because of how shirts or sports jerseys used to fit me. I didn't have some delicate physique nor was a puny thing, small but tall and able bodied. Then my sister would pinpoint my tomboy phase with my broad shoulder and that's where it started. Growing up in junior high and then into high school I knew I never looked completed docile, and my broad shoulders were always a factor. I actually really liked my high school uniform because it was an elegant style, sporty when desired, and it was a style that allowed me to actual "feel" feminine for a change.
Broad shoulders was always a thing in my life, always a challenge for outfits whether in high school or in college. It was always trying to because my mother and sister would try to provide me outfits that I didn't like but that would "help you look good with your broad shoulder". I knew then and know still now that it was all with good intentions with probably the thoughts that it, I wouldn't be concerned but the fact it was something I didn't have a problem with, and others tried to insist on clothing that would be more flattering to my physique...it all went into another direction.
After many trials and errors as well as personal reflection and my life circumstances it was blatantly evident to me (but not to everyone else apparently, because of course at the time they didn't know that I was going to be married let alone also have kids). It didn't matter what exercises I did to lean out, stay toned, have muscle, and it also didn't matter what foods I was consuming either. I finally decided to accept what was mine. I also secretly liked how strong I was physically for lifting and weights so I knew it would be something for a reason.
With the deadbeat father I sadly chose for my kids the broader shoulders helped in my life as a mother. Not just the first time but especially more so when the second little one came into the world. I was always trying to ensure that my arms could hold them both, I strove to make sure that my arms and hands wouldn't be weak to hold them both whether at the same time or when I was with one and the other. It was a promise I made to myself not just once but twice during my emotional nights. I would pray and work at always having a solid hard grip, that the muscle memory in the arms as well as my wrists would be strengthened and challenged. To hold my precious gifts in my arms, carrying one in the front and back at the same time, or in whatever way fits. I will try what I can do maintain the strength that God gave me physically. Not many women are powerful in their lower and upper body, well naturally and without body building or bulking up of some kind. It's part of my motherhood strength and not a flaw.
Embrace your shape by learning how it defines you and not how the world defines it. You'll be not only happier that way, but you'll know how to make it a part of what makes you attractively unique. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder-specifically speaking that's supposed to you your one and only that is.
Sincerely,
A Distinct Woman
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